For the past four months I have been working very close to full time due to taking on more rotations with Adidas. It has been a very big blessing and I don’t regret it. There are, however, consequences to mixing physically demanding tasks with an ever expanding pregnant body and mind! What are the consequences? Well for the last several weeks I noticed I am completely wrecked by the time Friday rolls around.
I leave work tapped out and usually spend the majority of the evening just crying it out in Tom’s arms. Then I spend the weekend doing as little as I possibly can; heck, even if we HAD spending money to blow I think I would still need quiet, home time to rejuvenate for another week. Unfortunately, it’s not getting any better and instead I’ve been starting my Friday crashes on Wednesdays .
I was just totally agonizing about leaving my office job. Just, so super torn thinking about the end of annual trips to San Francisco, more like annual anniversary trips of Tom’s and my real start! And other fun perks like Christmas bonuses, getting to use the boss’ beach house once a year (where funny enough both Wren was conceived AND most likely our little one was conceived!) Office birthday celebrations, and all other sorts of extra treats/gifts my boss spoils us with! I’ve of course, worried about how we are gonna make ends-meet without my office job but I always come to the same conclusions: Whatever I would make at the office would be spent on a stranger taking care of our baby, DOUBLE NOT WORTH IT! I was raised/spoiled with a stay-at-home-mom and ALWAYS planned on doing nothing less for my kids….then why the crap is it so hard?
Tom pointed it out to me Wednesday night, after my Friday crash hit Wednesday and I was a puddle of mascara mess upon the umpteen ruined shirts Tom owns! (I think he has 2-3 shirts left without some mascara stain from me! And we wonders why I am always wanting to get him new clothes!!!!) Anyway, he reminded me how much I despise change and how I loathe uncertainty and with so many unknowns and what if’s looming around it’s no wonder why I’m fighting making the decision of staying or not staying. Of course I’m not staying but in the world of Jessica, it’s almost as abstract as decided to get an electric car once we move to the moon! Meaning….having a baby is SUPER big change and thus the little decisions feel like life and death. Does that make sense?
I did give my…6-7 week notice this past Monday. I am happy to report I did it without crying! Haha I joke about that cause just about every discussion I’ve had with Vica (office manager, the woman who interviewed me, hired me, came to my wedding reception, understands me and who is SUCH a great person!) has led to me breaking down in some weepiness. I will add, I got an email from a co-worker yesterday that makes quitting that much more easier!!!
It read: Jessica, Can you move your fan after your shift? It's obnoxiously huge and crowds my cubicle. I understand you need it, but I don't want to move every morning. I would appreciate it. Thanks, (so-and-so)
Long story short, I share the desk with this person. My whole position was created b/c this person went from full time to part time so while I work: Mon, Wed, Fri and she works Tues, Thurs, and Fri (Fridays I hang out in the conference room). The days I work are still days I’m not at “OUR desk” but always HERS. A fan was brought in for me Monday due to feeling like an oven, not only am I pregnant but I move so much so I’ve been sweating while everyone has been freezing. Everyone has been cold in the office due to me turning the conditioning up so the compromise was keep temp normal and bring in a fan for me! But obviously, I guess I’m being a diva and asking so much! Oh this email was from a year ago and is a personal favorite!
Hey Jess,I came in today and my desk was cluttered with stuff, dirty and even smelled funny - especially the phone. I ask that you clean up my area when you're done with your shifts and try to leave the space the way I do, especially the drawers, etc.
I'd really appreciate it. That way I won't have to clean it every morning when I come in.
I'd really appreciate it. That way I won't have to clean it every morning when I come in.
I’m glad I can laugh about this now because when I got it I was SO super confused and irritated. I had NO idea what she was talking about, I use a couple of the desk draws because that’s where the supplies for my job are placed, not by me but by her request. As for the smell…..really? REALLY? Thanks! Oh gosh. I never responded to any of these kinds of emails. How do you respond to ridiculousness? I have just ignored it while being very aware of the egg shells all around!
Anyway, that’s the latest here!
Oh I have a response to the email. It would go a little something like this:
ReplyDeleteDearest [so and so],
Thank you for letting me know about your concerns. I will do my best to address those in a way that would be pleasing to you. In return I just have one request, and I understand if it may be a large one for you: Could you please make sure when you leave that you take your mean, bitchy aura with you? It too is dirty, reeks, and not like I left it. That would be awesome - thanks!
"Jess"
PS - Future emails received from you in such an unprofessional and inappropriate manner will be taken to management.
Ooh....good one Morgan. Jess, I love you. Having a baby is hard. The melt downs will keep coming, but just remember, one day your baby will smile at you and you will melt. Nothing else will matter. You won't remember you are tired, or poor, or that you have no libido, or that your husband is gone at work, or that you still have baby weight, or that you haven't slept in days...you will feel more love than you ever thought possible! All that baby has to do is smile at you!
ReplyDeletePS. There is no way that you did or would ever smell bad. When I think of you, one of the first thing I imagine is how good you smell. Seriously!
Love you.