First- Baby Showers. I thought Morgan had an interesting take on why parties being thrown for her can be uncomfortable- I feel the same but for different reasons. Like, growing up I loved going with my mom to bridal and baby showers even when I was very young; I just super loved being around older, experienced women who KNEW what they were talking about! I still feel this way which is probably why I enjoy Relief Society so much. Anyway... when I attended showers and took part in wishing the girl good luck and watching all the presents being opened it looked fun and there was a part of me that couldn't wait till it was my turn but...not neseccarily for the actual presents part, I just wanted it to be MY turn to get married!
In a nut-shell I just feel bad because I know how much time, engery, and cost it takes to put together even the simplest of parties and I feel bad that others are doing it for me ESPECIALLY during this time of recession and penny-pinching years! That's why I feel uncomfortable. I appreciate the willingness of others who either plan, put together the parties and for the persons who come bringing gifts- knowing they are on tight budgets too! I feel very grateful and yet very guilty! Let's see Dr. Laura says, "Guilt is used wrongly all the time! Real guilt comes when you're doing or have done something WRONG and not when you just FEEL like what you are doing/did is wrong!" So, do I really feel 'guilt' by others people sacrifices? Hmm YEP! Probably cause for the most part I don't recipocate. While I love gift-giving I haven't gift-gave or sacrificed my time like I use to when I lived on credit cards! And since I've seen the light, changed my ways, and budgeted for gift-giving- things have worked out BUT when income has changed suddenly- gift-giving isn't what it once was!
For the record! I LOVED those days when I shopped at Meier & Frank (Macy's) and would spend TONS on baby clothes for my nephew and Liam (first babies). IT WAS SO FUN!!!! I hope and look forward to the day when I can do that again. But for the record- I'm sorry I can't do that now for: Madison, triplets, Isla, Dottie, Elliott, Ruby, baby Sawyer, and Gardner baby! But please know- I think about all of them often, AND all of your birthday days too!
I do think its interesting that I am double-standard about gift-giving and time! I know they are love-languages and I usually like that door swinging one way! Like, I'm not a one-size-fits-all love language. I prefer to give and take differently with each relationship! For instance, With my parents: I want time and words of affirmation from them but how I like to show my love is with acts of service and gift-giving. With my husband: I want physical touch and TIME and in return I want to give touch and words whereas he likes acts of service and words! So I do lots of baking as acts of service- which I love to do anyway!With friends: I want their TIME and their words and with a few their touch! And in return I like to give gifts! So when the pocket book is empty I feel like I'm not giving LOVE and its tough so I try to give how I think they would like to receive! So ya- in general I want time from everyone and for the most part I don't like giving it BUT I don't mind giving acts of service which takes a lot of time AS LONG as its MY idea! Total time snob- I know!
Okay what else? Well its almos the end of July and I'm getting more nervous about what's gonna happen with our living situation. I think I've mentioned before how several people have moved out of our apartment building alone due to rates going up 150-200+ more a month. I've been crossing my fingers that during the past few months of seeing people move out but haven't witnessed people in- that the apartment management will get their acts together and bring the rates to a reasonable amount by the time we would need to resign come the end of August. Otherwise- moving at the end of August- in the heat, 3 weeks before I'm due GOOD NIGHT NURSE, PLEASE NO!!!!!
Car. Ugh. I almost just want to NOT talk about it cause its just so annoying. Car issues are just SO annoying, can I get an Amen! Tom's car is doing fine- there are some maintaince things that can be put off and thus we ARE but its now my car which has needed attention and is pulling a fit and thus we are giving it attention! It needs everything from new tires WHICH is a GAY story in itself! I got Firestone tires back in 2005 b/c Les Schwab had absolutely taken advantage of me with my '79 Dotson that was a P.O.S. thus I went with Firestone THO my dad DID warn me that they are worse than Lew Schwab- pretty much. Even though I have continuiously bought the 70K and 50K "good, recommended tires" for them- it has NEVER failed- every 18 months-2 yrs I have had to replace at least 2 tires. CRAPPY product! I WILL say that at least with Les Schwab I wasn't getting crappy tires- just crappy work done like alignments. So now, we are shopping around for new tires for the day when we can afford them (hopefully soon). My car also needs new radiator hoses, and something is going on with the steering wheel callum- (its been in the shop since Monday morning). I def have learned my lesson with American made cars- they MAY be cheaper in repairs and maintance than foreign but its still made CHEAP! Whereas Tom's car (Saab) has way more expensive fixes but for the most part have almost all been avoidable soooo for my dream car- I'm looking at a
Volvo! And for the record I've never been a car- girl but being married to a respector- of cars- husband, I have learned a few things! Thus, I'm liking this Volvo. I figure I can have 2011 in 2016! ;) But I'm sure by then we'll need a SUV! Ugh. lol
Okay that's my 2-cents for now!
Mo, Love the way your mind works: wanders in and out, then circles, then attacks (or vice versa!). By the way, column, not collum. Spell check, for crying out loud! Love your ramblings. Love, love, love them. I totally understand them. What does that say about me? That I am cool! Get used to the shortness of money. The recession is not going away soon. Until it does we all have to try to stay afloat.
ReplyDeleteCool Volvo. And I am sorry about the money problems, too. I just don't spend money, ever. And somehow I still don't have money?
ReplyDeleteThat's a good looking car. And yes, you can get an "Amen" on car problems SUCKING - it is hands down, absolutely my least favorite thing.
ReplyDeleteI feel like we spend money all the time but I feel like we have money too...and I'm sure we make less than all of you! I'm not sure how that works, but I feel super blessed to not feel "wanting".