Saturday, July 21, 2012

2 Years, 2 Steps, 1 Word

Anniversaries are pretty cool. Whether its our wedding anniversary, day we met, first kiss, whatever- they’re fun! Tuesday was Tom’s and mine 2nd anniversary, pretty cute, huh?! Though I feel I’ve known Tom forever I feel like we’ve been married for a couple weeks and yes I mean that in the best way! =)

We began celebrating the week prior by FINALLY going to Temple together. It was wonderful, we hadn’t been able to go since November which is especially ridiculous when we live 10 minutes away! Tom had that night off from Apple so we got a sitter and didn’t let anything stop us!
July 17th started off awesome! Tom made breakfast. I was craving biscuits and gravy (my favorite breakfast of all time) but of course I don’t eat that yummy stuff and instead he made my typical go-to: bacon and cheesy-eggs-with-salsa oh and a diet cherry dp to help get the AM pills down. –I don’t know how people take pills with water, it’s just not smooth enough for me.
Then he put on our song, “Try A Little Tenderness” –sung by Michael Buble and danced while Ben watched.

After we got showered Tom drove us to Mt. Tabor. It’s funny since Tom and I have been reading the Old Testament I now know Mt. Tabor is biblical reference! Anyway, Mt. Tabor is this quiet, beautiful park that overlooks Portland and has a couple water reservoirs or water treatment plants or whatever the bodies of water are for- they’re pretty!

I remember the first time Tom took me there, I remember we weren’t officially dating, I remember it was a hot summer’s evening, sun was getting low and shooting all hues of fuchsia, magenta, and green across the sky. I can NOT for the life of me remember his exact words during that first walk but it was something along the lines of how much he loved who he was being with me and how he’d never known anyone so good and approachable. I know I felt the same.
It had been over a year since the last time we visited our favorite spot and obviously Ben’s first time, it was nice.

We came home so Ben could nap, Tom and I even dozed off for a few watching Man VS. Wild (its our latest library rental craze we’re into).

After Ben got fed, changed, watered, etc. we did more running around including walking around the mall doing some window shopping (but not too much, its just depressing seeing and WANTING everything- you know?) and picking up some baby food. We were totally planning on taking Ben with us to dinner that evening but by the time 6pm came around and he had had little if any floor time and instead in a car seat, stroller, highchair, crib all day I was scared of what dinner in a restraunt was gonna look and sound like! I suggested we try going another night (fully knowing this night worked BECAUSE Tom had requested it off months ago from both jobs- later doesn’t happen) and just pick up a pizza or something but Tom said, “Nope, we are going out!”

Here’s the story about California Pizza Kitchen: It’s the place Tom took me to on our first date. It was the greatest date ever, possibly only rivaled by the night we got engaged; I say possibly because I kept forgetting I WAS on a date! I was so relaxed and just having fun talking, I didn’t feel like I had to work at thinking of something witty and clever to say or worry that I was talking too much or not sounding smart, etc, I simply had a GREAT time sitting across from him thinking, wow this is so nice, and he’s so fun, and funny and interesting! So here’s where it gets funny, the waitress comes over and asked, “is this all gonna be on one check or separate?” I looked at Tom, who hesitated, I really have no idea if it was a genuine 2-mississippi pause or a half Mississippi, I just know I am SUPER weird about money and took his “hesitation” as he couldn’t afford to pay for me- probably b/c I was/had been broke for SO long that I assumed he was too. Anyway, I answered the waitress, “we can do separate.” Tom said, “you sure?” Which only confirmed my suspicions in my mind since he didn’t insist, then the waitress loudly jerked, “Ah goin’ stage!” I’m pretty sure I wanted to drop-kick her.

Anyway, with all of our on-again, off-again and finally officially ON, courtship, engagement, etc., we never went back. In fact, it was kinda a slightly sensitive subject, sensitive like a 4 on a scale of 1-10 because I didn’t want to consider it our FIRST date when I paid for myself! Haha but come on, it WAS an awesome date despite so I’ve let it go.

So here we were, Ben’s to his limit of patience, Tom and I want to make this sweet return to FULLY rectify our first date mishap but not sure what to do. I texted Ash. She texted right back (NOTE: THANK YOU for being such a FANTASTIC texter-backer-quickly-person along with being a REALLY good go-to person!!!!) Ash came over and we went out, I even wore heels!
We sat in the booth across from our original spot- it was symbolic! Lol We had a good dinner, nothing fancy, I had a salad (surprise) and Tom had a pizza.

We talked, funny enough, about our ex’s for awhile, lol I know –weird but it was fun, then we talked about our 5 year plan, consisting of: getting out of debt completely, getting Tom through school AND if POSSIBLE getting into a house, which we then talked about how its gonna be frustrating working so hard to pay off 66K only to get into a mortgage for more??? UGH.

On our way home, Tom being Tom asked the question we’ve asked each other often since we were dating -how is he was doing as a husband and father and for me to give it to him straight even if its hard to hear. My HONEST reply? I didn’t want him to change ANYTHING he’s doing. He still comes through the door with a smile for me no matter how late it is, how many hours he’s worked, even if he’s stressed and needs major cave time, asking what he can do to make my life easier, just holds me when I’m having a tough day, week, month, whatever, insists he thinks my body is super hot even with my extra chub, works incredibly hard for me and Ben AND he’s SO flippin’ good with Ben. I remember a particular day when I was huge and pregnant, we were barely getting by and living on faith and I asked Tom, “So do you think the honeymoon stage is over?” Tom turned to me, smiled and said, “not even close!” It was just a month ago I was having a really bad day, actually it was more like REALLY hard few days, I called/texted about everyone in my phonebook but no one returned my call or even texted back and Ash was out of town. By the end of the umpteenth day I was miss crazy and I was sure I had worn out Tom, treating him like a girlfriend. After another big sob episode I looked up and asked, “Why do you think none of my friends are calling me back? I don’t think I’ve insulted anyone, not all at once at least. Is it because I’m crazy now?” Tom just shook his head and shrugged. “I’m sorry I have days like this, believe me however much its NOT fun for you, its REALLY not fun for me… Do you think the honeymoon stage of how you see me is over?” Once again he stroked my forehead, shook his head and answered, “Not even close Jess, it’s just begun.”
When we got home from our date and heard all about Ben going down in typical TIRED BABY throwing a fit way, we were sorry Ash had to deal with it and THANKFUL we didn’t take him with us! After Ash left, we checked on Ben, popped in a redbox and fell asleep soon after.
Our anniversary festivities aren’t over yet though- we are excited to go see the new Batman movie sometime next week. It will be our first movie together since Inception.  

In other news: I had chocolate on my anniversary. Peanut M&M’s and Junior Mints, specifically. Before I fell asleep watching the movie. I was a bit hesitant, I didn’t want it to cause me to go into a freak-out, in fact I could have very well not had any and been fine since I went an easy 7 painless weeks without. I wanted the test! I passed. I haven’t craved it since or missing it or anything. It doesn’t mean I haven’t had a wicked sweet tooth though- PLEASE… its been so bad I feel like I am living minute by minute some days resisting the urge to eat oatmeal raisin cookies or anything for that matter especially since I have NEEEVVVVERRR been so strict diet wise and getting nowhere, I can not express how demoralizing it is to work so hard and have no physical results! It was not like this years ago, I didn’t try half this hard and I lost quickly and it stayed off. I am super confused and am not sure what I’m missing and not sure Dr. M will have any advice for me either. Plus I re-read my diabetes books but there’s not a whole heck of a lot advice for individuals described “there are even some people who do not lose weight easily if at all even with a zero carbohydrate diet…but finding encouragement to continue the lifestyle even if it doesn’t produce weight loss” I think I’ve mentioned before I could try cutting out diet pop and cheese, after that I have nothing else to cut out. Maybe I’m not eating enough fat? I wouldn’t doubt it.

I do have ups and downs and on my down days I don’t want to eat my foods I am tired of so I simply won’t eat- of course that doesn’t help, I know. For a moment I thought cutting breast-feeding down to twice a day was helping but I think it was just a coincidence and probably water weight loss.
Tom: Got raises at both jobs- one was a HUGE raise, I think like 35% more. It's awesome and will make up for my lack of income especially since my job did major cut backs and I only work one day a month which I'm fine with. But anyway WAY TO BE AWESOME BABE!

Ben: Starting 4th of July night BEN SLEPT THROUGH THE NIGHT-FIRST TIME EVVVERRR! . I checked on him twice because I was conditioned to. He continued to sleep through the night for a few days but then…night #4 or 5 he woke up around midnight crying in a panic/pain way, no fever, no coughing, no tugging at his ears, etc. I gave him baby advil the second night and it helped, it helped night 3 and a few more after. I’ve asked a few people and I think Ben’s going through a growing spurt and having growing pains. I’m wondering if it is the reason for his super cranky episodes during the day too?

Ben took 2 steps by himself on July 15th. It was a fun moment! He still needs to learn to stand up without pulling himself up with something first and then the walking will come. I’m not pushing walking, it means he will that much more work sooner.

This Morning- July 23d he said his first word: Dadda. At first we thought it was a fluke but he has said it several times since! His dad was pretty proud =)

Monday, July 2, 2012

It's ALL about HIM!

I thought I would give an update and show off my adorable Baby Benjamin aka Benjamite or Bjorn-Jamin as Uncle Brian calls him =) This first video when taken 2-3 weeks ago.

Here are some cute photos

These with dad were taken in March but I love them so much I want to show them off:

 Here was just a couple weeks ago hanging with Grandma and Grandpa!

 Ok so last Sunday we went to the new visitors center that opened at the Portland Temple and Ben was given an oreo and a chocolate chip cookie (and yes it was no temptation for me) but he was given them without our permission which kinda tweeked me but not enough to do anything but complain now. Anyway, here he is loving that oreo (I threw one cookie away, 1 is enough for a 9 month old) 

And because its a Miracle of miracle I want to show Ben finally getting into food! YAY!