NOT For the Faint of Heart

Gosh it's been almost a month since I last blogged. I've been BUSY!
Just a warning that this post is graphic to some and for the rest of woman-kind who's experienced these things- It's a reminder!

Okay so I think I'll start with the my conclusion which is EVERY discomfort of Pregnancy is really nothing and that its ALLL in the purpose of preparing me (the woman and mom-to-be) to be REALLY uncomfortable later. I'll explain.

First: Constipation. You know, I really thought that word/verb was just something "old people" and old people alone went through. I had a grandma who was VERY verbal about her bowels and it use to absolutely drive my mom insane. I'd listen to grandma's complaints and ME being ME would always jump to the judgment (non-verbally of course) that she just needed some meds or to eat more prunes or something. BUT since this aliment has affected ME I have found that not only does it SUCK but no amount of prune eating or drinking will cure it. Infact, growing up it seemed that my parents kept prunes around quit often and while I would hear a sibling now and then complain about the ramifications from devouring too many- I NEVER experienced the same fate- and I think I even assumed they must had eaten something bad and THAT'S why they have bathroom "issues." A few months ago I was at my parents place and I was downing prunes like peanut M&M's and....nothing. I think I just have a high tolerance to them. Anyway, the point is Prunes or no prunes constipation has been an unfriendly visitor and I swear to gosh- the past couple of weeks I have clogged MORE toilets than I ever want to really own up to. I even clogged the 10th Floor office toilet with is one of those super-duper toilets that would suck down a fur tree. Heck, I had even done a pre- "curiousy flush" and it STILL clogged! And...water ran over...and I had to call the building's maintaince guy. I was mortified.
Also, I've pushed SO much that the last ohhhh four epic bathroom tournaments have led to me totally freaking and thinking I just had the baby in the toilet. But nope....no baby just another clogged toilet!
(See I told you this wasn't the most pleasant and flowery of posts!)

So what does this have to do with preparing me? Well IF you have to ask you're RETARDED! I'm a great pusher now- pretty sure OLYMPIC medalist level. And I think all this junked-up, backed-up bowels that wait in silence for days and then BOOM -watch out; is going to really pay off come birthing. At least that's my sincere hope. Otherwise I'm just my grandma reincarnate!

Second: Peeing several times through the night. I think this one's obvious, peeing takes just a few minutes and it really doesn't interfer with my sleep a whole heck of a lot but it has gotten me use to waking up 2-4 times a night when come on- feeding a baby will take more than just minutes or getting up in the middle of the night with a fussy infant, kid who pee'd the bed, sick kid, etc. Those are all WAY worse than getting up to pee even 5 times a night!

Third: Money. Its gone. Period. Not sure I need to elaborate. And not sure it will ever be in our lives again.

Okay, in other news. Hmm well if some of you didn't already hear about this. LAST Thursday (8/18) was a super busy day. I had lots of appointments including an Adidas rotation. I basically hit Adidas early and worked as fast and as hard as I could cause I had a Dr. appt at 1pm then I would have to go back and finish up well all I remember is that I was sweating alot and lifting heavy things- typical stuff and by the end of the day I was pretty tired but really nothing out of the ordinary.

Well I hit the shower after 9pm and while I was there I started having some pains which at first I totally pushed aside as ohh it must be gas. Then I was like oh crap I think I'm gonna have diaherra, then cramping in my pelvis. My stomach blew up and got really hard and all those feelings would last about 30 seconds and then go away and then come back again every 3-4 minutes so then I was like ohhh I must be having my FIRST braxton-hicks that I'm actually feeling! (Since my ob said I'm having them all the time I'm just not aware of them YET!) Then after the first handful the pain got worse really quick and I started kinda going into labored breathing and I was like what the crap is happeningggg??? So I yelled for Tom who couldn't believe I hadn't called for him sooner- he chewed me out a little, as he doesn't want me in pain especially without him knowing and helping. I got out of the shower and thought, I'm calling Bek, she'll tell me if I'm having gas or B. Hicks or False Labor but she didn't pick up cause she hates me (JK ;)

So I laid down and Tom brought me a cold glass of water and I opened my Pregnancy Book- went to Braxton Hicks, but what I had felt didn't match their description so then I went over to False-Labor and read how false labor can feel pretty much like the real stuff but if you change position and drink something and they stop- its not real labor and I was like- hey I totally did both without knowing to do that! And yes, they did stop shortly after doing both. All together I had contractions for about 25 minutes and pretty back-to-back.
I had a hard time really sleeping because all I could think about was holy cow that was very unpleasant and I feel VERY unprepared for the REAL Pain and how the crap, WHAT the crap do I do? I haven't taken Lamaze or any classes. I'm gonna be a mess!

Well the next day I was at my office job and kept having the feeling to just call my Doctor and let him know about the false labor- I called and the answer back was it didn't sound like false labor but the real thing and whatever I was doing, I was pushing myself too hard. To STOP, Put my legs up and rest for the rest of the weekend. SO I did. I had my LAST Adidas work day this last Tuesday and I took it easy, I promise.

Okay that's all I'm gonna say for now. I really have been meaning to take more pictures but I'm super bad at taking photos- for crying out loud Tom and I don't have a single honeymoon picture and that's my fault I thought I left the camera at home when it WAS in my bag the whole time but its like what would we have taken pictures of? Me being a complete birthcontrol-hormone-induced-basket-case-lady? I don't think so....