Whine with My Fish

Okay so I've been meaning to blog about this as a reminder to future me and a learning experience for everyone else.

Due to our wedding anniversary landing while I was in Houston and us being too cheap to take time off work to go on a date, we waited until Tom had a Saturday shift where he would be off early enough to go out when more than bars are open!

I had plenty of time to find a sitter but Lacey was busy and dang it I didn't want to pay someone...so what happened? Well obviously when you make dumb decisions BAD consequences result.

Tom got off at 6:30pm and I made sure to have Ben as ready as possible when Tom arrived, not wanting to delay a moment of Ben being in his somewhat "manageable stage of the night". Earlier I had made a spontaneous trip to Old Navy to get some much needy clothes with the money I DID have budgeted for a sitter.

SIDE NOTE: I have become a clearance rack shopper. When I was younger clearance racks were way beneath me. Now I've gotten over myself and I'm happy when I can get a brand new shirt without issues for $2.50, I mean you can't find that at a thrift store. I was able to find a pair of MUCH needed jeans and five shirts for 45 bucks. not bad =)

I know I tried on at least 15 different combinations (not exaggerating) from my findings and what I already had and could not feel awesome. I so wanted to look and feel the way I did when we were dating when I knew I looked great and hot for my guy, granted Tom DID think I looked hot that night even if I didn't feel it.

For a good month now I have been craving seafood. GOOD SEAFOOD. The best I've ever had was from a restaurant downtown Portland at a ritzy place (funny enough I had spent a first date there with another boyfriend). It was SUCH great food and there's no way he walked away paying less than $150 for our meals! Gosh it was sooo good. Anyway, that was my first choice but me being me and us being us that wasn't where we went THOUGH if I really wanted to I know Tom would have been fine, I really am the cheaper of the two of us. So we chose to go to our favorite restaurant, Cheesecake Factory with its ridiculously large menu, I mean half the menu would still be too many options but its awesome is it not!? PLUSSSS its our tradition to get crab cakes for our appetizer so that would help with my fish craving.

By the time we got to the VERY popular restaurant ON A SATURDAY night that doesn't take reservations no less...we had a 50 minute wait. It was 7:15pm. That meant normally Ben would be going down in 15 minutes. It meant every minute of reasonable 2 year old was ticking away. It meant we had to find another place to eat and fast! We found a Red Lobster on the TomTom super close by and it took driving up and down the street a few times until we saw a small sign saying the place was being remodeled and wouldn't be reopening for a few months! Then we were like CRAP, now what? Our last choice. A VERY distant 3rd place choice was Portland Seafood Company that's is located on the other side of the mall from Cheesecake Factory. By the time we were seated it was after 8pm, we SHOULD have just stuck with our place in line at C.F.!

There were hardly any customers (our first clue) and the menu was pricey (ugh) but he sat down and pretty much immediately asked for an appetizer asap. Very surprisingly Ben was all over the calamari. He loved it! This from a kid who eats the same 10 items day after day and mostly CRAP. Of course by the time we got our entrees Ben had gotten a piece of calamari in the back of his tongue, gagged, and then barfed all over. The nice waitress brought damp cloths and wipes, etc. Ben was fine after a moment but didn't want to eat anymore, of course, though his belly was now NOT full again. Tom and I ate FAST as Ben was getting restless and we were fighting to keep him quite and from running around. We barely had any dinner conversation as husband and wife. I think I asked, "So what are you most proud of that we've done in the past 3 years?" and "What goals do we want to set for the next year or even next couple months?" I may have ASKED the questions but the interruptions were too many to remember we even had a conversation going at all.

Ben cried/screamed most of the ride home and only stopped for moments when I would contort my body to face him and engage in peek-a-boo. When we got home we still had to try to get some food in his stomach because for several, several, SEVERAL weeks/months he's been getting up numerous times a night needing refills of his sippy (milk) -BECAUSE he WON'T eat enough before bed so he's been getting filled up on milk! AHHHH KNOCK ON WOOD- that refilling has stopped the last 3 nights this week though him getting up and needing help going back to bed has NOT. A GOOD night I only get up twice, a BAD night (like last night) I get up 5+ times.

Overall, I wish I would have listened to my brother Rex's advice earlier that eventful Saturday, "Don't take your kids with you on your anniversary dates. They weren't there when you got married, they shouldn't be there when you celebrate it each year either."

In closing, Tom and I didn't get each other gifts this year. But I did ask for a card! Since I can't have a whole lot of his time so I definitely want his words! So he made me a card in iPhoto and had it sent to me. I don't think he would mind me sharing his words...

My Dearest Love

I don't know what I'd do without you.

All I know is that I'll never let you out of my sight;

for these last three years have been the happiest of my life.

May you forever be by my side, and may you always know how

deeply and passionately I love and adore you darling.

Happy Anniversary My Love.

Gentle, Kind, and Peaceful

I read yet another birth story this morning. I love birth stories but maybe not THIS kind. It was all about how it was this woman's fourth birth and how the first two were "traumatic" with "unnecessary interventions". And after baby two this person looked into hypno-birthing and other such stuff. For the record, I'm not ANTI pain management in all its forms, please I'm very PRO. But when it comes to having a baby there is SUCH an arrogance not there that laboring and birthing without meds is wise, healthy, and even heroic. GAG.

I've blabbed about all this before so I'll just get to the point. In this particular story the writer said how after reading "natural" birthing methods she learned birthing is SUPPOSE to be "Gentle, kind, and peaceful." Yep. I must have read that sentence like 10 times, like, wait did I skip a line? 

Here's my point. These kinds of birth stories usual start with "with my first kid(s) I didn't know what to expect and in turn had a terrible birthing experience so then I educated myself and got a doula and/or midwife and then life was amazing!" It kinda makes me want to slap someone. BECAUSE it implies being educated and ready makes all the difference between having a labor that goes how you want as apposed to not. It simply isn't true. Of course I think reading and preparing and choosing the best birthing method you THINK is best for you is fantastic; I'm simply saying I know people who did just that with preparing FIRST and still had horrific birthing experiences. 

Anyway, I think labor is just like pregnancy. It's hard. There are GREAT moments! i.e. Feeling baby move, when everyone else can finally feel baby move too, the excitement from everyone around you, the stronger bond between you and your spouse, going into labor and knowing he/she is coming soon, being in labor and having FANTASTIC support from your spouse and family/friends, working so hard to push that beautiful life into this world, etc. 

I also think labor is like pregnancy. It's hard. It's painful, most of your ouchies are about your girl parts or your exits on your body so talking about them isn't pleasant, having someone IN them isn't pleasant; you're quite uncomfortable most of the time no matter what pillow you use, position you're in, what foods you try to eat to help your nausea, and other than your mom and girlfriends you feel quite alone in your pain and it can be scary. So.... birthing being "gentle, kind, and peaceful"??? I say WOW her epidural must have been AWESOME! 

Enchanted Forest 2013

Growing up Enchanted Forest was like Salem's DISNEYLAND. Going every few years was a BIG deal and I remember loving it. When I was really young my family including some cousins went together and while in the "haunted house" and there's a corner where a mechanical monster (triggered in your steps approaching) comes toward you. Well somehow Brian and I got left behind right before that corner and we were paralyzed for what seemed like a year, every time the monster would retreat back into darkness I'd take Brian's hand and we would try again but sure enough that monster would pop out and we would whimper away. I'm pretty sure we were even crying too. So sad, right? Anyway, the last time I went to Enchanted Forest I was 8 and my mom was like 7 months pregnant with Lacey. So this year my mom and dad were ready to take their kids back through that haunted house! Just kidding. They wanted to take their grandkids to the theme park. 

When you're young everything seems so much longer than it really is. I was reminiscing with my mom a few weeks ago and I asked her how long we kids would stay at parks and mom was like oh 45 mins and I was like WHAT? I totally thought we would stay for hours! haha Going to Enchanted Forest as a kid was no different; it was a blast and the only sad part was leaving. Going back as a parent is NO different and ABSOLUTELY different! 

It only took seconds upon entering the park to feel so impressed with my parents! I have one kid. ONE. They have/had five kids to chase down, clean up, take to the bathroom, put in time-out, give dead threats to (I'll take you home right now if you don't stop!) etc etc etc. AND they did it willingly all those times growing up. WOW. So now they must not have learned their lesson because they were doing it all again but with six grandchildren (Seth was at camp). Of course Rex, Aleece, and I came along but even with five adults we were each exhausted by the end.

This is Ben hanging out on my parents dash board. He was so tired and while waiting for me to get everything together and go home he found the unlikeliest of comfy-zones. 

How many times did he get snapped in only to be taken out moments later? I stopped counting at 15

This trip marked the FIRST time I got the triplets down...well I FINALLY memorized which color is which! Rex & Aleece have color-coded their kids and for more than FOUR years I couldn't even remember THREE colors! But this trip I succeeded! Alex is blue, Riley is Red, and Zach is green! Baby Josh I call Squashy-Joshy WHO, for the record IS the best, easiest baby EVER! I'm not even messing. Maybe it was from the c-section and he's perma-calm but I'm telling ya IF he cries its more like a little on-off whimper and the rest of the time ALWAYS smiling and happy and he can sleep through decimal levels only known from front row rock concerts and the White House.

Because Ben is so comfortable with water I had to keep my eye on him and yes he DID try to get out of the boat a couple times but I was barking at him and ready to just the fence to get him if necessary.

I think I'm the worst parent because I'm already dreading the next visit to a theme park BUT remembering how much I LOVED it as a kid myself is the only motivation to give that experience to my kids and then grandkids! Ben and his cousins are truly so spoiled and loved by their grandma and grandpa! =)